Depression

I've been really down for the past few weeks, and i cannot define it in any other capacity then depression.
morbid... i know but i cant help it...
in those dead and empty moments where im by myself  i end up thinking too much...
the true definition of an introvert but i cant help but think about my future...
but contrary to normal i have found some very depressing topics to contemplate...
where i would normally daydream about some wonderful adventure i ended up thinking of my future and how
i will most likely be alone for my whole life... because i have chosen my career before others...
i plan to take the world by storm... but that storm tends to blow away any chance of love entering my heart...
and whats worse even if i did find someone to love there is no guarantee they would want what i want from a relationship... for instance.... i dont want to get married, or have kids... because commitment scares me and kids are distracting and often a nuisance but i have a feeling that the person i want will not want the same things... which worries me...
because i hate to see people in pain, and i would never want anyone to sacrifice their own desires because they love me, that kind of feeling for others is perhaps beyond my scope of understanding feeling.
i occasionally wish that i was a machine in the emotions department (and work ethics) but i may yet regret that wish because i dont know if i can feel for others the way they feel for me...

Does that make me a monster?

Or am i more human than i think?